We saw our bean!

...and he or she has a little heart fluttering away! I am SO relieved, but it was terrifying going into the scan room, not knowing what we were going to be told. Jamie had to come with us too, as I didn't want to tell anyone else about what had happened, so couldn't ask either of the Nannas to look after him. The sonographer was lovely though and found Bean within seconds and turned the screen round so I could see. She said there is an area of implantation bleeding, but it's very common and shouldn't cause any more problems. The bean measured 6+ weeks, which is what I thought I was, so that's a good sign too.

Afterwards, we went to Bourton on the Water with my mum, to visit my gran in hospital, and she was on good form. Was tempted to tell her our news, but I'm still not feeling 100% confident, so would rather wait til after the 12 week scan. Just so relieved and happy that everything is ok. Hang on in there little bean! x

The good news is that Wayne is back from Scotland - he left Stonehaven at 2am, as he just wanted to be here with us, and got home at 11am. I'm so glad he's back. The other bit of good news is that there hasn't been anymore bleeding since yesterday afternoon...I think this is good, but part of me wonders whether there just isn't anything left to come out :(

Not so good news is that the GP didn't phone this morning about a scan. In the end, I rang the surgery and had a stroppy receptionist tell me that he's busy with patients and he'll get back to me when he can. I waited a bit longer and then decided to take matters into my own hands, and rang CGH and asked to be put through to the Early Pregnancy Unit. I'm so glad I did, and wish I'd done that first thing this morning, as the doctor I spoke to was lovely. She said the fact that the bleeding has stopped is a good sign, and has booked me in for a scan at 11am tomorrow. The unit is only open in the mornings, which is why I couldn't go today. The GP did eventually ring and was apologetic, but I felt a bit annoyed that he hadn't kept to his word and rung me first thing.

So we're still waiting, and just hoping so much that tomorrow brings good news.

Think it's all over :(

I started bleeding today while I was at work. In my usual way, I tried to carry on as normal as I was in the middle of a lesson, but knew something wasn't right. At lunchtime I went over to the staff loos and it seemed that I had lost a lot of blood. It slowed down through the afternoon, but that hasn't really reassured me. I went to pick Jamie up from Wayne's mum's, and then rang the doctors and managed to get an appointment this evening. The doctor prodded my tummy (I think to see if there was any pain as that could indicate an ectopic pregnancy), and said there wasn't really anything that could be done - the pregnancy could carry on as normal, or it could be all over. He's going to arrange for me to go for an early scan and should be ringing in the morning to let me know what time.

The timing of this isn't great, as Wayne is in Scotland at the moment and not due back til the weekend. I'm really scared. As much as I want to know what's happening, I'm also terrified of going in for the scan and them saying there's nothing there. I'm trying to rest as much as possible tonight and just have to wait and see what tomorrow brings I suppose.

Gonna be a mummy of two!

I'm only 11dpo and my temperature dropped this morning so I was convinced we hadn't got lucky this month. As usual though, I couldn't resist doing a test, just to be sure - but was fully expecting a negative result. But lo and behold, this appeared!

I did another one a bit later and there was definitely a line on that one too, so it looks as though it's really happening!

I'm so excited! Due date according to internet calculators is 23 May 2010...2 days after Jamie turns two - eeek!

Holiday time!

We headed down to Cornwall for a week with Wayne's mum. Jamie loved being carried around in his back carrier, and it was great for taking him down to the beach.

His Daddy taught him how to build sandcastles, and also gave him his first proper dunk in the sea...he looked a bit chilly afterwards.



The sea air seemed to agree with Jamie and he slept til past 7am most mornings...unheard of when we're at home!

Jamie's understanding is really coming along now...I'm just starting to realise how much he knows when I speak to him. If I say "would you like a drink?", he looks towards the taps. He's also getting really good at doing things like stacking rings and putting things into his shape-sorter. Maybe he'll be a builder when he grows up!


I've started taking him to a local children's centre on a Wednesday. There is a soft play room where he can practice his climbing, and also a sandpit, which he loves!

Party time!

Jamie had his birthday party today! He had a lovely time with his friends, Charlotte and Maya. We bought far too much food but Jamie had a great time and got lots of nice presents. We were hoping for a warm, sunny day so people could sit out in the garden, but it poured with rain so everyone was squashed into the kitchen!

On the way to walking...

Jamie has been pulling himself up to standing for a couple of weeks now, and is getting more and more confident. He's not quite cruising yet but I don't think it will be long til he can move around holding onto things. His crawling is getting faster and faster - he loves to crawl away at lightning speed while we chase him :)

His 1st birthday is approaching fast and we are planning a little party for him. I can't believe how fast this year has gone!

Trip to the farm park!

Jamie and I went to Cotswold Farm Park today, with a friend of mine and her baby. We had a lovely day. Jamie enjoyed the swings and the soft play area, and I loved seeing the newborn lambs :)

Clapping!

Jamie has learned to clap today :D He's been able to clap his feet together for ages, and can also clap our hands together if we hold him on our laps. But now he can clap himself, and is doing it all the time. Another proud mummy moment!

Health visitor check-up!

Jamie had his 9 month check today (a bit late, as he's 10 and a bit months!) and it went really well. She chatted about his feeding and sleeping, checked that he could pass things from hand to hand, hold things in both hands at the same time, pick up small things, bear weight on his legs, sit, etc.

She also weighed and measured him and he is now 21lb 1oz, so bang on the 50th centile for weight. He was born on the 25th centile but dropped down to the 9th until we started weaning, and has now crept up to the 50th. He is 76.5cm long, so between the 75th and 91st centiles for length. I was surprised as I thought he was quite short, but he seems to be growing longer now! I'm tall so maybe he takes after me.

She has written in the red book that he's a "delightful chap" so I am a very proud mummy today :D

I've got an early morning waker! He usually wakes at about 5.30-6, which is just too early in my opinion! Sometimes if I feed him, he'll go back to sleep til 7.30ish, but that's pretty rare and so we're usually up very early. If he'd just last til about 6.30, that would be fine.

We had issues with him not wanting to BF in the evening the other week, but fingers crossed, things seem to have gone back to normal now and I'm still doing 2 feeds a day. I'm hoping to continue til he's 12 months at least.

His crawling is getting really speedy now, and he's started pulling himself up to standing - we had to lower the base of his cot the other day as we were worried he might dive out head-first! His favourite sounds are dadada, bababa and rararara...oh and brrrrrrrrrr, especially with a mouthful of food! I keep trying to encourage mamama but it's not happening!

We took him to the beach on Saturday, and he had a nice time digging in the sand. Can't wait to get J a little wetsuit and get him on a board.

I can't believe he's 10 months old already! This time last year, I was on the countdown to finishing work. I saw that a new series of the Apprentice is starting this week, which really freaked me out because we watched an episode of that while waiting for me to fully dilate before I could start pushing!!

Back to work :(

I've survived a day and a half at work and it's been ok, nowhere near as bad as expected. Just tomorrow to get through and then it's the weekend! Jamie seems to have been fine with my mum, I think they've been having a lovely time together! I've missed him, but work is so manic that I don't get much chance to think about him for long, when I'm in lessons and stuff. But the cuddles when I get home have been lovely

Jamie keeps waking at 6am for a little party. I'd ignore him and keep dozing but he stamps his feet against the cot bars and it's SO loud. I worry about waking the neighbours so usually end up going to get him.

Jamie has his 2 bottom teeth now, I think the top two might be next. He's getting really fast at crawling, it's so cute seeing him trying to get around, he's so determined!

Eyes in back of head time!

Jamie is crawling now which is really funny to watch. He'd already been rolling everywhere to move himself around so it's not too much different really. It's more of a commando crawl on his tummy than a proper crawl, but he can get around very fast! He loves turning on Wayne's PS3, which is not proving popular! I really need to get a stairgate now.

I'm back at work on Monday...I can't quite get my head around it, it doesn't seem real somehow. I had a cry last night...been feeling really sad that maternity leave is coming to an end. It's only 2.5 days a week so hopefully I'll be ok. I just want to get Monday over with so I can stop worrying about how bad it'll be!

Teeth!

Jamie's first tooth is just about through - the bottom left, and I think the right one is coming through too. Which would explain why he's been grumpy for the last couple of days!

We're down to 3 BFs a day - at 7am, 3.30pm and 6.30pm. I've had to bring back the dreamfeed because of him not sleeping through, and have been giving him formula for the last few nights as I'm struggling to express anything. It seems to be working as this morning he slept til 7.30 Hopefully I'll be able to drop the dreamfeed soon and I'll then move the formula to the 3.30pm feed, ready for when I go back to work.

I go back to work in 5 weeks...I'm feeling v. v. down about it. I keep waking in the night worrying about it all...but hopefully once I've got the first week out of the way, it'll be ok.

It's hard not to worry about milestones...Jamie doesn't sit very well - if I put him in the sitting position, he just pushes himself backwards so he's lying down. We met up with a mum and her baby who is 3 weeks younger than him this week, and it was really obvious how much better she was at sitting than him. I do worry about it a bit... But she wasn't rolling, whereas Jamie is. I guess they all do things at their own pace.

Happy New Year!

Well I've got 8 weeks more mat leave left, I'm going back after Feb half term. I'm really not looking forward to it at all. I'm going to try and enjoy every minute with Jamie before then though.

Jamie is trying to crawl and can kind of shuffle himself backwards a little way, but he just loves rolling at the moment, it seems to be his preferred method of moving from one place to another. I can't really leave him on his playmat anymore as he will roll himself to the other side of the room in a few seconds! However many toys I put round him, he insists on making his way underneath the Christmas tree, or onto the hearth instead. Think I need to get a playpen! He's sitting well, but I still wouldn't leave him alone while sitting as he sometimes topples over.